I have finally gotten around to uploading some pictures of the Nilsen family Christmas to my computer. Apparently I took 53 of them (dunno when that happened, I didn't think I had the camera out that often...but I guess I had) so I won't show you guys all, but I thought I'd share a small selection at least...Looking through them a lot of them were strange ones of my sisters in pyjamas, but at least there are a few that's fit for public viewing...
☆♥☆♥☆ The Christmas tree! ☆♥☆♥☆
Me and my sisters! ...they would probably kill me if they knew that I uploaded this picture (for some reason they alway think they look dumb in pictures), but what they won't know won't hurt them >_<
Anway. The one in the middle is Stina. She's our baby still even though she turned 13 this year...I don't think she'll ever really stop being the kid in the family, hi hi. Sarah is the one on the right, she's 2 years younger than me and she has always been "the pretty one". (You guys have never seen my sisters before, have you?)
...And then there's me! I look a bit odd but what the hell... ^o^ Do you like my new haircolor?
He he, these were all I could find. There is like 20 ones of our Christmas tree (don't ask me why) and a few of my relatives but none of them are particulary good so this'll have to do for the time being...
Have a great day everyone! (^ _ ^) Matane!
Pull me out of bed, I need to cry. My blue eyes won't give into my needs. My heart is too cold for the ice to melt n drip down my cheeks. so much to do. No motivation. Need to let go. Need to cry
So disgusted with the emptyness within. Distracted most of the time, but as soon as the silence hits depression screams wildily in her head. Questioning her choices, and questioning people she wishes she could change it all. Letting go is easy when anger pushes her to release her grip. In angers absense she struggle to loosen her tight embrace. Wanting and waiting for it to pass. The feeling makes her hollow, as if every memory doesn't mean anything but empty index cards in her life file. Her worse critic she looks past all good, walks past all who loved her, and sits right on despairs face
It might not be in the holiday spirit, but we want to know anyway: What's the best present you received this year?
I really liked all my presents, but being able to say I am home for the holidays and not going anywhere for the next foreseeable future was probably the best part of this Christmas. In years past, I either have been unable to make it home, or have had to return to my duty station after only a short time.
What's the hardest, most embarrassing or most inappropriate question you were asked this holiday season? Who asked it?
I do not remember anyone asking me anything embarrassing or inappropriate, though I know my grandmother made some very inappropriate comments on Christmas Eve regarding something that happened earlier this month. It was way too early to be saying anything about it, especially at a holiday gathering, but my grandmother does not think before she says stuff at times. And she wonders why I do not like talking to her very much.
My visitors counter has reached 30.000, and in a way I can barely believe it. It's not as much as some of the really successful blogs have, but it is a lot more than I ever thought I would get. My life isn't particularly eventful, I am no person of significance or one that has a lot of great thoughts. No I'm just a girl like so many others, sometimes a whole lot stranger but usually quite like everyone else (or well, it's mostly people that doesn't know me so well that think that, but still)...
So I am amazed by the fact that so many check out this place so often, that my life can be of interest to such a big number of people. And I am eternally grateful. I don't know what I ever did to deserve the kindness you all send my way, all the kind words you send my way irregardless what strange thing I do.
In all honesty I don't think it's possible for me to put into words how much I appreciate your support. You're all so much more dear to me than I ever thought people on the Internet could be. No matter what happens I know that you'll be here for me, and I am really trying to be as good to you all as you are to me...if I don't show it properly I am truly sorry about that. Know that this place helps me keep sane, gives me an outlet whenever and whatever I need one and that I (for the time being anyway) don't quite know if I could function without it.
I hope that I'm getting through to you with these words. It's 12.45 in the middle of the night and I am listening to ABBA's "Happy New Year" (song below) and feeling nostalgic...so my words might not be completely coherent....You all know how I get during the night...
Just know how much you mean to me, okay?
And in case I forget to say it later...Happy New Year!
Good morning guys. Well technically it might not be morning anymore (11.30, can you call that morning?), but since I've only just finished breakfast and getting dressed it feels like it is so...I'm still at my parents house, in case someone didn't know (I'll be staying here for about a week longer, past New Years) and don't get me wrong I love it here - I would have been terribly lonely in Lund - but at the moment I am terribly restless. Back home I have things to do even though they might not be so fun, like cleaning waching, cooking and such, but since every such thing here is done by my parents (yes I am still that spoiled) I end up without anything to do.
And so here I sit in my bed with my computer in my lap and music from "Absolute 90's" (my sister got it for Christmas, it's nostalgia on a very high level) in my ears. It's not that bad for now I guess, but rather it's the notion that I could do this all day that makes me feel so bored. We've been through this before, I am a person that needs to have things to do to be able to enjoy relaxation, and so that's why I don't know what to do with myself right now. I could (or perhaps should would be the more accurate word in this case) read some in my psychology book - I have a little more than half of it left and the test is on January 18th - but I don't want to. Yeah I know, saying that I have only myself to blame for being restless, but that's who I roll...you guys know this. It's messed up but then again so am I (in sooo many ways) so it's not a lot to do about it ^o^ I was thinking about going for a walk but it's so much snow I don't know if it might do more harm than good (i.e. I would fall down and brake a leg or something instead of getting some well needed exercise)...I still might brave the elements and do it anyway though, we'll see.
Oh! Speaking of nothing...Did I tell you that I am a redhead now days? Hi hi, I didn't did I? Anyways I am. I got a new haircut (well an update of the old one) and color on the 23rd! It's really red, but I like it...it suits my temper. A photo is coming up, I promise, but for now I don't have any makeup and look quite messy over all so it'll have to wait until another day. Okay? *Yawn*, I really have to get a hold of myself and do something because this is going to drive me crazy. You can only stare at a computer screen for so long before it becomes too boring...especially when said computer screen looks the same no matter how many times you update it.
I've discovered something about myself (speaking of nothing once more, it's a lot of that going around at the moment it seems): I miss my class. This might not sound so strange to most of you, since it's natural to miss people you're used to seeing several time a week, but the ones who have read this blog the longest might understand how it's significant for me. Belive m, I don't mean to sound all difficult and unapprochable, but I have a hard time really connecting with people. Sure I can talk to almost anyone about almost anything (as long as the subjects in question are shallow) but it's not that common that I really feel at home with people...or at least it take quite a while. So it's a little strange for me to discover that I miss them, a little strange but quite nice. It'd be bad if I didn't, ne? (I think it would). I miss some more than others (which ones are for me to know, and you guys to - perhaps - find out), but still I miss most of them, the group as such, over all...
I'm so bored! Hm....sorry about that, but I am. I really can't think of anything to do, and no one else in the family seem to be bothered by the fact that they don't have anything to do...so I suppose it's up to me to think of something. And we've already established that that's not something I am good at. So I'm afraid I am going to have to be bored. Crap. I'll talk to you guys later to tell if I did think of something or not.
Have a great day! (^ _ ^) Matane!
Hello mina-san. It's getting late here in Sweden...or at least if you ask my mother. She wants me to go to bed, because she wants to and apparently she can hear my typing even though I'm in a completely different room (dunno why, it's a mum thing I guess). I don't want to be a pain, because I am staying here over the holidays for free after all, but I'm just not sleepy at all. You guys read my blog, you know that I am a night person.
So what to do, what to do...?
Hm. It's a difficult one, ne?
Perhaps I should start by turning off the computer, as that makes it that much harder to go to sleep, but I don't want to do that either. There's nothing worse than laying alone in bed not being able to sleep but just toss and turn a million times...which is why I rarely turn off the computer before like 10 minutes prior to bedtime (I know I know, it's bad for you to do it like that because the mind needs to be able to relax a while before sleeping - I am studying psyshology after all so I am aware of all this - but I don't care).
I am currently snooping around Facebook and some other sites, as sticking my nose in other people's business is somewhat a hobby of mine (or well, I don't actually interfere, I just sit quietly on the knowledge) but that's only fun for so long. Which is why I am writing this totally pointless post (gome ne everyone, I just had to do something).
....Anways, I'll get back to browsing Facebook now.
Oyasuminasai mina-san. ^ _ ^ Matane!
So I got a laptop bag from Erika (thank you) and a gloomy from Charles (thanks). I hate the idea of riding around with a HP devil computer logo and I have a lot of Gloomy. With the help of MANKILLER-FANG industries, I had help making my idea come to life. So. I'm pleased!
"Love is not something you learn, love is something you know but don't realize until you have it."
- Anonymous
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